Katie Rock

After the Accident

She needs to remember. She is a mother. Tyler says hi to his momma. I haven't touched a drop since the accident. You my wife. He forces her legs apart. He breathes. He says you my wife you need to do wifey things with me. He comes home drunk. Yep, them trees don't know when to give. Her mother gives her money for groceries every other month. Nickels. Pennies. Anything she can hold onto. She collects money in an empty green bean can above the stove. Them trees, well they hold on and hold on. Those boys need to remember it takes more than one man to cut them old trees down. He vows to take care of Blanche even though she loses her baby. He scrubs the pails clean. Joe empties the buckets into the river. Rusty nearly cut his right hand clear off with a chainsaw last week. The boss gave me a few days off. I've been here every night and day. She does not want to leave any trace. It snows. She bleeds into buckets because the outhouse is too far away from Joe's cabin. It is going to be a girl. She loses the first baby. I thought you was real dead. I thought you was dead, baby, the way you was bleedin from your head and all. There is no time for nonsense. She is going to be a mother. She puts her diary away after writing I skipped my period. You look real purty tonight. She is 17 going on death without ever knowing love, at least that's what she writes in her high school diary. He is the first boy who pays attention to her. A red rose. I hope you're ready cuz he's got a rose for ya. Joe's here. She hears her mother's voice call up the stairs. Blanche Sue Parsons. I didn't see that other car comin. She doesn't want to remember her name. She doesn't want to read the letters. She forgets his face, his hands, his thorn rose tattoo winding around her name on his left shoulder blade. She wants to ask but her speech has not yet caught up with her open eyes. Why you're my husband? Why, I'm your husband, Joe. She asks his name. Accidents. That other car was headed right for us. Baby, I'm real sorry about the accident. She is a mother. An accident occurs in the back of a sky blue pick-up truck. Suddenly she remembers she never wanted to be a mother. She is a mother. Tyler says hi to his momma. I brought you your pink robe, the fluffy one. Hey baby. I thought you was never gonna wake up. His fingers are stained brown even though he is not smoking. He wears the light beard of a man who has not shaved in days, a white t-shirt with circular yellow stains under the arms, cut off jeans. He sits to the right of her bed. The dust is the only familiar part of her waking state. She watches particles of dust swirl in sunbeams. The light is brighter than she remembers. And then one day she wakes up.